love spells, hexes, and how not to turn your love spell into a hex

Love spells, hexes, and how not to turn your love spell into a hex!

What is up witchy friends?!?

Last Friday I celebrated my 3 year anniversary of self partnership! In honor of this occasion I decided to share my knowledge and experience regarding love spells, hexes, and how not to turn your hex into a love spell! (Hey, I learned the hard way so you don’t have to.)

This is by far the topic I receive the most questions about! My newest video addresses the most common questions and concerns I hear about love spells and hexes. It’s short and snappy with my hot takes on the important issues to consider. Feel free to scroll down for the video or read my notes first:


This is MY opinion based on my personal practice and experiences. However there are many differing opinions on this subject and they are ALL valid! If you disagree with anything I say here, please know that I accept and respect your views. I believe magic should be personalized and what is right for you is what feels right for you. Feel free to take from my words what resonates with you and leave anything that does not.

Secondary disclaimer, please don’t blame me if things don’t work out the way you want them to. By proceeding, you hereby take responsibility for your own magical workings! And so it is.


Consent is always important, even when it comes to magic!

I recommend sending a “flirty wink” out into the universe versus trying to influence a very specific outcome. (Even if you do want something specific.) Pay attention to how you want to feel more so than exactly what you might want a certain someone to do.

Think about what you REALLY want.

Be careful what you wish for! A spell can be a little like a mischievous genie… magic can backfire! I know I just told you to detach from a specific outcome, but you still want to have a clear intention behind your spell.

Ultimately, it is the intention that matters most.

Take time to reflect not just on what you truly want, but also where this desire is coming from. How do you really want to feel?


When you are in the energy of wanting something, you are in the energy of not having it. When you are desperately grasping for something (I call this grasperation), it actually keeps things at arm’s length.


What I recommend getting crystal clear on is how you want to feel when you achieve your desired outcome. Would you feel butterflies in your stomach? Would you feel relieved? Focus on that feeling first!


When it comes to the actual spell, you can make it as elaborate or as simple as you want.

I do not recommend taking people’s hair, blood, or personal belongings!

Whenever you are coming from a place of “grasperation energy,” taking something of someone’s, and trying hard to make something specific happen, you are creating a bind to that person. You may think you want this now, but if the situation changes later, this could just make it that much harder for you to let that person go.

What you DO want to do is put all of your feelings and energy into this spell, and once you are done, LET THAT SHIT GO! Trust the universe and do your best to let go of any attachment to the outcome, wondering or worrying how it will manifest, etc. Pass it on to the universe and trust life to deliver the results to you in the perfect way at the perfect time.


Supplies for your spell are optional, but I recommend them as they give you a physical object to focus on. (And they are fun!) My two favorite witchy love spell supplies are rose quartz and spell candles!

Rose quartz is the stone of love. (It’s my favorite crystal in case you can’t tell with all the pink up in here!)

And spell candles, well… THEY WORK! (Don’t say I didn’t warn you.)

You can buy spell candles or make your own. (I have a video on that coming up next!) They can be anointed with oils and inscribed with symbols that magnify your intentions.


As you will see in the video, my original love spell candle has seen some serious action. (It’s almost completely used up and part of the glass cracked off because the damn thing exploded last time I lit it.) I’m going to briefly tell you the story of how I manifested my last boyfriend, as a cautionary tale.

Last time I did a love spell (about four years ago as of this writing), it was a full moon. I lit a spell candle, had some rose quartz with me, and wrote down exactly what I wanted.

Sure enough, on the night of the next full moon (!), I met this guy in the most synchronistic way. First of all, I randomly went out that night because a friend was moving to NYC – and the guy I met had just moved from there! Even more strangely, he had the same hair color as me, which was pink and purple at the time. I was like, OK universe, I see what you did there.

Here’s where I kind of fucked up. I had originally asked for a fun temporary thing… and then later down the line, really did not want it to be temporary. But it was. That is why I say be careful what you wish for!


Don’t worry, you have options. Reversing a love spell gone wrong or unwanted attachment is called uncrossing. You can buy candles or perform a spell for this – search “uncrossing candles” or “uncrossing spell” and go with whatever feels right to you.


I frequently get asked about hexes. Again, please note that this is JUST my opinion and if yours is different I accept and respect you – your opinion is 100% valid too!

If you are starting to go down a path where you are thinking about hexes, it may be worthwhile to take a moment to ask yourself:

What do I REALLY want out of this situation?

Do I really want to put more energy out there, or do I just want to feel better?

Especially if you believe in law of attraction and / or believe that we create our own reality, that means that your magic is flowing to where you are putting your energy. Be mindful and consider whether it may be more worth your time to invest your efforts in a higher vibrational endeavor.

Fear can come up during discussions of magic out of concern for negative energies. But if you are putting your energy in higher vibrational planes, you are not even in the same playing field as negative lower vibrational energies.

In short, if you don’t worry about it, you don’t have to.


I would love to open up the floor on this discussion! I welcome different opinions and experiences. It would be awesome to hear what has worked for you and what you have learned on your journey! Feel free to share in the comments so we can keep learning from each other!

Here is the video version of this juicy chat!

(Please note I originally made this for IGTV, hence the vertical video.)

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